Shortly before she dies in November 2021, Mom receives roses while she is in the nursing home.
As I opened the front door to see if I had received any mail that day, I noticed a small, white SUV pull up on the street at the side of my house. I did not recognize it, yet I noticed a small woman with white hair peering out of the back seat window. I could see only her dark eyes and the top of her head, but I could tell that she was alert and excited. When we made eye contact, she smiled at me. I returned the smile and waved even though she was a stranger. I then went back inside.
Trying Out the Fiat
Is he nice?
At first glance, the old woman did not look like my mother. The visitor had long white hair piled on the top of her head, while my mom, as she aged, always dyed her hair so that the gray would not show and, most of the time, Mom’s hair was short. Somehow, though, I saw my mom in the visitor’s mischievous, bright eyes.
With the vehicle still running, all three people got out of it. I had turned back to look out the front door and realized they were headed my direction even though I still didn’t know who they were. I went out on the front porch and said, “Hello!”
The driver, who said she was a neighbor while vaguely gesturing to the north, indicated she had a weird question for me. She said her mom was interested in buying a Fiat, but they wanted to know if she could sit in the driver’s seat and see out of the car clearly. She asked if they could “try out” the Fiat parked on the street by my house. Unfortunately, I could not help with that since the Fiat was not mine. I directed them to the neighbor behind me. They asked, “Is he nice?” Although I don’t know him that well, I said that he is. I really only know his name because sometimes his mail gets delivered to my house by mistake.
Jokingly Asking a Question
Have small children gone missing?
As the daughter and other passenger headed toward my neighbor’s house, the mom turned to me and asked a more indirect question about the neighbor and his friendliness: “No small children have gone missing from the neighborhood, have they?” She kind of cackled with a smile and asked the question again when I didn’t respond like she wanted me to the first time. She continued to smile at her own joke as she shuffled along the sidewalk after her daughter.
Her laugh and her enjoyment of her own joke reminded me of my own mother, who also had a sense of humor. My mom enjoyed those moments of her own jokes immensely and really wanted others to appreciate what she had said, too. I saw my mom in the visitor’s humor, humped back and shuffling walk.
Caring about Mother
What do you hear?
The mother and daughter clearly had a caring relationship. The daughter obviously wanted to help her mom and would do almost anything for her mother including stopping at a stranger’s house to ask a strange question. In this unexpected visit, I saw my sister’s and my relationship with our mother. I heard our laughter as we went on adventures, and I saw my mother’s love for us reflected in the love these two visitors had for each other.
Thinking about Mother's Day
Will the Fiat work?
When I looked out my window a few moments later, I saw the other passenger adjusting the Fiat’s driver seat so that the mom could test out the view for herself. When I checked again, they were all gone. While I had not gotten any mail from the United States Postal Service that day, I still received a message of love. I’ll never know whether the Fiat turned out to be a good fit for the mom; however, as I think about this second Mother’s Day without my own ma mere here, I know that she was visiting me that day through someone else’s mother.
Sending you lots of motherly love, the unconditional “you are wonderful” kind,
Angela Jane