I didn’t mean to make my sister cry. I was only teasing. I can wait until she returns to party with her, but I also can party without her until that day arrives. After all, I’m an adult now, and I celebrate my birthday all month long at a minimum and all year long as a preference. I am so celebrate-able any day or month of the year.
Celebrate for a Year
Why just one day?
Let’s go back a decade to see how a year-long celebration works. Fifty days prior to my turning 50, I started receiving count-down-to-50 gifts. The first one had “50” on it. The next one had “49.” The countdown was on and the only way I have experienced turning 50.
My sister, of course, was the count-down mastermind. In her honor, I spent the year I turned 50 doing 50 weeks of random acts of kindness. It was a scary commitment because I had no idea how I was going to complete the task of giving every week.
At some points, I had faith I would figure out what to do when I needed to. At some points, I cried. By the 50th week in the year I turned 50, I had done all sorts of giving – small things, big things, one thing and multiple things – to coworkers, friends, family and strangers. The reactions to the giving ran the gamut as well – unabashedly, happily accepting to reticent and refusing.
Embrace Aging
Why stop there?
At the end of that year, I decided I should have added giving in the final two weeks as a bonus boon. I completed the bonus boon the following year by volunteering for Dreamcatcher South Africa for two weeks in December. That out-of-country traveling inspired lots of travels in and out of the country over the past decade: Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Minnesota, North Carolina, North Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Virginia, Wisconsin, Thailand and the Philippines.
I learned a lot in my travels these past 10 years, and I have grown a lot personally and spiritually during my 50s as well. While my 50s brought some of the biggest challenges of my life, they also brought adventures, love, laughter and new perspectives. Society has tried to tell me that I’m not beautiful, that I weigh too much, that I’m clearly not enough as is. Society has said to me that aging is horrible, that I should be ashamed of my wrinkles and of my getting old.
However, society can take a flying leap into the abyss because society is completely, without any doubt, wrong in this.
We cannot stay young – and to be honest, I never wanted to do so. I was horrible at being young. But, I can be an invisible crone – it's my sweet spot. I have found freedom in being overlooked because I’m nothing society is seeking.
In recognizing that I am nothing, I become everything.
Don't Listen to It
What does society know?
I live alone, but I am not lonely. Please don’t let society tell you those two things are equivalent. They are not. I have felt lonely in a crowded room and felt surrounded by love in a place all by myself. These lessons have taught me that I shouldn’t always listen to society. It doesn’t always know whereof it speaks.
Despite what society has taught me to expect about aging, I am learning to be fantastic at this age, and I can act child-like to get the enjoyment I missed when I was young. It’s a perfect union of knowing better and knowing curiosity. So, here’s to turning 60 – I plan to start my sixties by celebrating in style. First up on the celebration docket: an apology to my sister – I never intended to make you cry. We’ve got a decade (I hope) of 60s ahead. When you come home, I’ll be ready to party with you. You can even pick the month in which we celebrate!
Eat Dessert First and Then Play Games
Who wants to party?
Secondly, my Wonder and Whimsy Society family is throwing me a party – well, it’s not actually a party for me, but I chose to go on the field trip with them as part of my personal celebration for turning 60 since the field trip is so close to my birthday. It’s a party for me if I say it is (smile). Who’s in for dessert first?
Thirdly, I’m inviting everyone over for board games and food the Sunday before my birthday. Sometimes, parties have to come before the actual birthday when the birthday falls mid-week. That board game party IS a party for me by me. After all, if I don’t coordinate a party for myself, who will?
My wish for my sixties is to live with open hands and heart, to accept what is without resistance, and be present in this moment, for it’s all we ever really have. Here’s to a decade of inner peace, love, laughter, magic and dancing.
Sending you lots of celebratory love,
Angela Jane